"Look at me and tell me who I am..."

[psalm_onethirtyone]

I don't want to write ever again. No. Just--no.

I'm not getting any enjoyment out of it, and I don't care, and I feel like all I'm turning out is bad material, and it doesn't seem like other people are interested. And yes, I am one of those people who can't work on projects without outside support. Wanting to do something myself doesn't work. I need someone else to want it too, which is why I'm always taking commissions.

But to-day I hate it. I don't like what I'm writing, and I don't like the prospect of writing, so I feel horrible and guilty because I've just taken all these requests, and--stuff.

No. Don't want to write anymore. Don't want to touch the keyboard for writing.

Damn, but I have to write Emma's story for Scum Club, and I don't even want to do that. Thank God I'm quitting.

I hate my writing, and I hate myself, and I do not want to do it.

AHHHHHH.

This is so. Stupid. Stupid? Yes, Soujin, it is stupid.

I do not want to talk to anyone to-night, as I all I have been doing the last week is whining or crying or angsting at people. I'm sick of doing that. I'm angry with myself, and I hate myself every night when I get offline because all I've done is whinged at some innocent person or another.

Stupid.

'But lately I find that I reek of discontent and it fills me...'

And shit, it induces headaches.

Comments

[bewareofitalics]

Your writing is great. I've loved everything I've read by you. If I don't comment, it's because I'm lazy (or because I don't know the fandom and therefore didn't read something, but I digress). And you'll probably get even better the more you write.

That said, if you're getting burned out, by all means take a break! Maybe writing will become fun again if you don't do it for a while.

[rainbowjehan.livejournal.com]

*blushes* Thanks.

Also, you're right, of course. Taking breaks is just something that's usually kind of hard for me. Didn't start writing till 2:00 to-day, however.