My mother is a Lit major. She made me read The Scarlet Letter when I was twelve. Twelve! That isn't right. But I totally just read Michael's story. Oooo... At least no one will ever read Helen's. It's over a thousand pages long. And did I mention it is the first book in a trilogy? The man may have won a nobel prize, but he was insane.

I choose you, Pikachu Wishbone! Literature attack!