Soujin (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
psalm_onethirtyone) wrote2005-09-29 10:13 pm
psalm_onethirtyone) wrote2005-09-29 10:13 pm
"El Camino, Where Are You Going? Do You Have Some Room For Me?"
I shall be spoilt and dreadful loads to-night, I think.
I should like to be hugged and kissed upon the cheeks by everyone who will. I love you, I love you, I love you--will you love me?
I am cheating on my diet again. I am eating carbohydrates--specifically, Kashi cereal. Also I am eating fruits--specifically, our Asian pears and one of our beautiful Red Delicious. Damn me. I am so tired of dieting. Did you realise it's been more than a year now? It makes me want to be sick, and it makes me feel trapped and tired and scared. I don't want to do this for the rest of my life, do not. I am ill of it. I don't think I'll ever feel beautiful no matter what I do.
Ack! My leg cuts are bleeding again. O_O They are dripping. Must scamper off to the kitchen for towels!
...If any one still wants to give me a hug after that. *chokes* Please? I should love it desperately--I'm not melancholy, I'm just prettyworried. I should like to be hugged.
*shrieks* Augh, it's running down my ankles. Excuse me, I most assuredly need a towel. Augh. *fwomps off*
I should like to be hugged and kissed upon the cheeks by everyone who will. I love you, I love you, I love you--will you love me?
I am cheating on my diet again. I am eating carbohydrates--specifically, Kashi cereal. Also I am eating fruits--specifically, our Asian pears and one of our beautiful Red Delicious. Damn me. I am so tired of dieting. Did you realise it's been more than a year now? It makes me want to be sick, and it makes me feel trapped and tired and scared. I don't want to do this for the rest of my life, do not. I am ill of it. I don't think I'll ever feel beautiful no matter what I do.
Ack! My leg cuts are bleeding again. O_O They are dripping. Must scamper off to the kitchen for towels!
...If any one still wants to give me a hug after that. *chokes* Please? I should love it desperately--I'm not melancholy, I'm just prettyworried. I should like to be hugged.
*shrieks* Augh, it's running down my ankles. Excuse me, I most assuredly need a towel. Augh. *fwomps off*
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If the diet's making you feel worse instead of better, then it's time to lay off it. Period.
Come talk to me?
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It makes me feel even worse than worse, though, when I'm not on the diet. I wasn't when we were in the Adirondacks--I gained five pounds and hated myself most passionately. It's just that I've been going up again all summer long, and I hate that, too. And for some reason, my metabolism is quite mad--it's silly to blame it on my metabolism, I shouldn't do that--but I can't even eat a piece of real bread one day but I don't gain weight. Mum says that shouldn't happen, but it does, and it makes it so I can't mantain my weight. I can't ever stop dieting or I shall just gain everything back, and I hate the idea of that.
*flails* God, sometimes I wish I had been born impossibly homely and nicely slender.
I shall. I just need to get ready for bed first.
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'kay, good. *tugs on*
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*comes!*
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This is Hamlet, and
this is Horatio. He's sitting inna teacup.
And me, I am just right here in front of the computer loving you so much it hurts but not really because I love you so much.
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Hamlet!kitty actually looks like my Osiris, back when he was just a little thing.
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*flails* No, that's not right--!
You're welcome. I'm--you're welcome, so.
--Goodness, he does. Awwwww.
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I love you. I hope your legs get better soon, as that sounds really gross and not fun at all. *cling*
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I love you too. I love you! *hugs again* And it is gross. Thank you. ^_^
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I've seen pictures of you and, well, I think you're adorably pretty. Please don't bleed to death before we get to know one another better --!
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*flails* Thank you. I shall endeavour to staunch the blood flow. *risks a look* They seem to be all right now. Am not getting on the carpet, at any rate.
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Well, you are! :D -- yes, that seems like a good sign. I think. Er? I tend to end up getting blood all over my papers when I bleed.
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*ducks* I won't be satisfied until I'm a copy of Venus, or perhaps Helen. --Eep! I tend to have a special blanket for bleeding on. XD Papers is slightly a problem, you see. Well, I imagine you do. I imagine you know quite well. *babbles*
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*swats* As if anyone could be. I've given up on beauty, myself. Mostly I get "cute," though, so I'm settling for that. And -- well, that seems a bit extreme. XD I just grab whatever paper it seems likely nobody will see and... bleed on it, in order to not get the blood anywhere else. (This is a weird conversation.)
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Well, I want to be. *ducks again from swatting!* But cute is nice. ^_^ And adorably pretty from you is a compliment high indeed! I want pictures of you. XD that works. Actually, that's quite sensible. I like to use my blanket because I'm usually sitting on it when I bleed, anyway, so that works. Also, is silk (I KNOW. I bleed on a WHITE SILK BLANKET XD), so it feels nice on the cuts.
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Don't we all, though? I mean, really? ...and yes, um, um. Let me find the one picture of me that that I don't hate. Oh, here. That's from... spring. :D ...The only blanket I have is my security blanket which I've had since before I was born NO LAUGHING, and I can't bleed on him YES HE HAS A GENDER. (...that's not very smart, Soujin. XD)
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Do we? Really? All of us? --Awwwwwwww. OMG. You're so CUTE. XD No, but, really. You're all cute-pretty and have such pretty-cute hair and OMG PANSIES OMG. --My blood-staunching blanket is from before I was born, too. :D I NO LAUGH. Well, that makes sense. Once you start assigning genders you have to take more care. (I know, isn't it not? XD)
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*Clingmadlovehug*
I love you.
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*Squish*
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*MADLOVE*
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...*and uses her Special Magical Internet Powers to make Soujin's legs stop bleeding, cause eeeeew*
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;_; Thank youuuu.
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iloveyou.
It's not sad as much as it's revolting. As I said, it looks as though I was mauled in the calves. :D Not so much romantic as OMG RABID ANIMAL ATTACK.
...Iloveyouiloveyouiloveyouagain.
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Look! Baby hedgehogs!
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Thankyouthankyouthankyou--! *hugs for-ever*
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I love you.
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