Um. Okay, I realize that I'm commenting a little late, but I just absolutely had to. First of all, though this is slightly different, I understand where you're coming from with the comments about religion. I find it incredibly insulting when people who know that I am a Wiccan ask me things like, "do you drink blood?" or "Do you kill people and sacrifice them?" in part because of the nature of the questions and in part because GOOD GOD ARE YOU REALLY THAT STUPID and then I remind myself that that is judgmental and yes, it takes all kinds. I think the worst one I've gotten is "Your religion doesn't exist." That one stung me to the core. Secondly: the ED thing. When I first met you at the Young Writers conference, some girl was talking to me and she looked over at you and was like, "gosh, she must be so brave to dress like that" (or something along those lines, I don't remember), and I told her that it wasn't necessarily that you were brave or felt brave but that you were just yourself. I had just come out of what I identify as the worst year of my life, when my depression and self hatred were so strong that I heard voices on several occasions, and during all of that time when I was hating myself I still tried to be myself and people would tell me that I was brave, but I really wasn't. I was killing myself inside, and I was afraid. I'm afraid that I lack the eloquence to say what it is that I intended, but I guess what I wanted to say was that, even though we didn't become close at the Young Writer's Conference, I felt like you were kin, and that was incredibly comforting at a time when every moment felt like I was losing my mind. Our situations are different, but... I'll be twenty a little less than a year from now, and it's only at this point in my life that I've come to terms with the fact that, yes, I'll probably have depressive episodes for the rest of my life, and it will suck when they hit me, but that's not going to stop me from living. gah, I'm sorry, I didn't mean for this comment to be so long. I just wanted to say, you go girl.
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...long comment is long... .__.;;;
Date: 2010-02-03 12:27 am (UTC)Secondly: the ED thing. When I first met you at the Young Writers conference, some girl was talking to me and she looked over at you and was like, "gosh, she must be so brave to dress like that" (or something along those lines, I don't remember), and I told her that it wasn't necessarily that you were brave or felt brave but that you were just yourself. I had just come out of what I identify as the worst year of my life, when my depression and self hatred were so strong that I heard voices on several occasions, and during all of that time when I was hating myself I still tried to be myself and people would tell me that I was brave, but I really wasn't. I was killing myself inside, and I was afraid. I'm afraid that I lack the eloquence to say what it is that I intended, but I guess what I wanted to say was that, even though we didn't become close at the Young Writer's Conference, I felt like you were kin, and that was incredibly comforting at a time when every moment felt like I was losing my mind. Our situations are different, but... I'll be twenty a little less than a year from now, and it's only at this point in my life that I've come to terms with the fact that, yes, I'll probably have depressive episodes for the rest of my life, and it will suck when they hit me, but that's not going to stop me from living.
gah, I'm sorry, I didn't mean for this comment to be so long. I just wanted to say, you go girl.