Feb. 12th, 2006

psalm_onethirtyone: (It's a Little Sad To-Night [made by kyuu)
Warning: Church-oriented post liek whoa. Pls skip if you are likely to be annoyed.

So. ^___^ Father Julian came back to preach one more sermon before he moves to Ohio to his new parish. He's so wonderful. I'm going to miss him lots, but it's so wonderful that he got accepted to the parish.

(I never know what to call Daphne, by the way. I usually try to call her Reverend Daphne. It was so much easier with Father Bill and Father Julian and even Father Harmon, but it feels so awkward with Daphne. ;___; I want to do it right, and she's so warm and wonderful and huggable that it feels stiff calling her 'Reverend'. Guh. Why isn't there an easy way about this?)

And he preached about being healed of leprosy, and reinterpreting the passage in the New Testament about the man Jesus healed. It was--a very beautiful sermon. I usually fall asleep during the sermon (because I fail at getting any sleep on Sunday nights, because I am stupid), but I couldn't to-day. And I copied out the Psalm into my beautiful journal Manon gave me, because I wanted to keep it. Mum says actually it's Nana's favourite Psalm (or it was when she could remember it). It's Forty-Three. But I also found One-Thirty-Nine, the one Nanni wanted me to read, and oh. It's--oh. I copied it, too.

Because of the snow, we only had thirty-four people, and the lay minister didn't show, so it was only me as acolyte and Father Julian and Reverend Daphne for service participants. But that was all right.

I am, incidentally, going to the church retreat two weeks from now. I had not mentioned that before, but. Because, demmit, Soujin is religious (she is constantly worried that people will not like her for it, but the fact remains). Of course, it was definitely a deciding point that Daphne will be there. I've never done anything like this before, so we shall see how it goes.

(And Daphne and I talked about praying to-day, and it was. and I. you see, I can never talk about this sort of thing. praying goes into something different for me, it's not just saying something, it's very--and I don't know.)

We had beautiful hymns to-day, too, and I like processing, because I am a dork. And I love my vestments, because I am a dork.

And I want to go to church next week, too, because we are having a healing service, and I--want to go. Ah.
psalm_onethirtyone: (Zara - Westmark)
In other news, I love this song.

Manon, Manon! ^___^ I finally uploaded the songs I wanted you to hear, even though it took me approximately a million years. Storyteller and Lifetime of Song. I think they are Zara songs. Yes. We shall see.

Mum is still ill, and putting her resume up places. The nursing team she works with right now is asking for six patients in an eight-hour day, and no one can do it, not with two hours of charting, so she needs to get a nursing job somewhere else. She's asking everywhere. Unless she works (as a nurse), we don't get health coverage. (And with all my psychiatrist and clinic visits and medications, we need health coverage badly.)

Isn't this beautiful?

I told several people that I didn't think the Prozac was working, but actually I think it is. I still feel the same way I did before, but I don't want to kill myself for those feelings any more. And that's a step forward, isn't it? That's making it, somehow. I haven't treadmilled in four days, but it doesn't feel like the end of the world any more.

(Of course, I forgot to take all my medications yesterday, because I'm forgetful and rather stupid, but that's beside the point.)

I wonder if I'll be happy this year on my birthday. Last year all I remember was not telling anybody, and hating every moment of it, and forgetting it had ever happened (so that for four months afterwards I always accidentally told people I was a year younger than I am). I wonder if this year I'll be proud of it.

This is all a little rambly and beside the point, but I'm not sure what the point is, so there we are.

The fire in the fireplace makes me happy, and I spent this evening reading poetry out loud to Mum, from all my poetry books. She said she likes the way I read. I--that's the sort of compliment that I actually believe. It's the sort of thing that makes me smile.

The snow to-day was beautiful. The witch hazel looks so funny and lovely with snow on it, and all the trees. The snow makes everything right. And now I will do something that I should be doing, although to be perfectly honest I am not sure what that is. Have I told you often enough how I love you? I love you, I love you, I love you.
psalm_onethirtyone: (Pomegranate Hair [made by kyuukumber])
By the way. I bet you didn't know that Soujin can write really bad poetry. :P But she can.

ExpandFlower-Ring )

Profile

psalm_onethirtyone: (Default)
Soujin

January 2012

S M T W T F S
12345 67
89101112 1314
15161718192021
22232425262728
293031    

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

Expand All Cut TagsCollapse All Cut Tags