Whoever Dances is One with the Universe

Welp, it's that time of year. I'm leaving the warm and fuzzy embrace of my school's fast, unreliable internet and going home to our slooowwww reliable internet. We're going to Tennessee on Sunday, and I'll be back God-knows-when.

Since I probably won't have internets until at least after Christmas when we get back home, I would like to wish everybody happy winter holidays, a successful end to the season of finals, and a minimum of family-related stress.

Love y'all, see you around. ♥

Dear My Insurance Company:

Congratulations! You have proved your sagacity. The fact that I have taken the same medication every day for the last four years might convince a lesser mind that I actually need it, but you in your wisdom have seen through that ruse. As you have guessed, my medication is purely an extraneous expense that I continue to pay monthly in the hopes of making you, too, suffer the associated financial loss.

Someone else might just accept that since three different doctors have signed off on its necessity said medicine might just as well be purchased, but you, Insurance Company, understand that action is called for in these situations. That is why you have taken the bold step of cutting me off.

It is now my third day without medication, but I am still alive, proving beyond a doubt that I do not need it to survive. The symptoms of nausea, vertigo, migraine, and increased weeping are merely psychosomatic effects of withdrawal that will soon fade. Despite the fact that my job involves protracted stretches of car travel, I am sure that I will not endanger myself or anyone else by driving while dizzy. Within a few weeks, everything should be fine, and it will be obvious that you have made the right decision.

Or I'll be dead, I guess.

Thank you for your prompt and thoughtful actions!

Very little love,
Soujin

Dear Pharmacy Man:

Thank you for fronting me two days' worth of my meds. ;___; I feel a bit less like I'm going to die now. You are a good man.

♥
Soujin

Dear body:

I hate you too. Now do you mind?

No love,
Soujin

Dear Livejournal,

On the subject of your e-mail to me about my paid account expiring: it would be easier for this not to happen if you accepted Paypal accounts backed with a bank account instead of a credit card. Just sayin'.

Ennui,
Soujin

Dear Phil:

You are a sweetheart. You are a lovely lovely person and a good friend and believe me I know and appreciate this fact. I do. But we need to talk about something.

Phil, you actually know, unlike many people out there with whom I am friends, that I am in remission for an eating disorder. And I know that you just care about my health and want to make sure I am doing okay, but, for God's sake, Phil, can you please please shut up about my portion sizes?

Because, see, when you comment on how much I'm eating it reaffirms for me a very unpleasant idea, the idea that everyone in the world ever is watching me eat and judging me for what I eat. I know it seems like one little comment to you, but for me it means everyone is judging me ahhhhhhh. And then I have to go home and cry all night.

So please stop.

Love,
Soujin

addendum to Liz: Thank you for saying that it only looked like a lot of ice cream because it was in a bowl instead of a cup like everyone else's. And for saying that I was sick and deserved lots of ice cream anyway. You are a true friend. ♥

Dear Internets:

To-day we bought a meat grinder. It makes three different sizes of sausage! I am waiting for Maria to put her arm down it by accident, although technically I'm more accident-prone. Also, they would not let me buy explosive varmint cartridges for the .22, even though I asked real nice.

Also, I appear to have written Spock/McCoy (SOMEBODY had to!). It's on my laptop, but I can't go to the library (with the internet) until Friday. Would anyone be willing to beta-read it for me if I send it then? TOS, very short, kind of silly, involves hand-kissing. PG, honest to god.

That is all the news!
Love,
Soujin

Open Letters! :D

Dear Doctor of Soujin's Eyes:

You are a very lovely man, you are. And thank you for the glasses cleaning cloth (moss green! *accessorises*) and the helpful comments and the fact that you look like a platypus and therefore always make my day better. However, there are a few problems in your office that I think you should be aware of.

Firstly, the young man who is evidently your new employee. You seem to be under the impression that he is an eye doctor. Unfortunately, he is actually an expert in medieval torture. I think you should look into this.

Secondly, that little film in the waiting room about OptoMap is clearly a pretty nifty idea. It lets patients into a new way of preserving their eye health, and it does so in an interesting, colourful way that shows a little bit of the history and potential. But. If you continue to put it on repeat, you will need to get your patients out of the waiting room a whole lot quicker, because after the sixty-third time around, even a really nice person wants to stab little Lief Anderson and his smart dad. And that's just wrong.

Thirdly, put some restraints on the torturer. He's wasting your yellow eye-goo. I know because he used it on me far too frequently and for no identifiable purpose, which can only mean that he's decided to ruin your reputation by leaving you eye-gooless during some emergency. Imagine!, Doctor of Soujin's Eyes. There you are, in the middle of an important procedure, and suddenly the nurse yells 'GET THE EYE-GOO!'. You look to the torturer, and he looks back with guileless eyes, and says, "I'm sorry, sir. I used it all on Soujin to make her cry'. The patient, even under heavy anesthetic, lets out an audible gasp. What people will think! Clearly this is a bad thing. I suggest immediate action.

By the way, thank you for finding out what's wrong with my eyes!

Love, Soujin ♥


Dear Mr. Adams:

Lost is a shiny show, from what I've seen of it; so I'm prepared to trust you. <3 However, Matt Daemon as Captain Kirk? Also, as much as I am totally in love with Adrian Brody's nose, I do not think he is the best choice for Mr. Spock. At all. Please look into this, just for me? And fire the person who's doing your casting. >_>

Love, Soujin ^__^


Dear Gentleman who is Designing our New House:

Please stop coming to dinner. ;___;

Wibbles, Soujin


Thank you all for your kind attention...! ♥

P.S. Over the past week I have had to subsist almost entirely on peanut butter. I do like peanut butter a great deal, but not in subsisting quanities. I reallyreally need to go shopping. *shifty eyes* Because I sense that lunch to-day, like breakfast, is going to involve a peanut butter sandwich.

And we are not amused. -_-